Wednesday, January 20, 2010


About a week before my birthday I had decided to bail on the whole thing. I would just skip it, like all the other days that I tend to skip. In all honesty it was a depression thing. K asked me what my plans were for the day of twenty-fiveage and I told her of my very good plans of skipping it. She then informed me that I couldn't do that. After a mopey conversation in the car, I agreed that I would let her and C surprise me but that they should include Mom in whatever they were doing.

There were a few snags in the plans they made so we bumped the birthday bashing up a day. K stayed the night and then in the morning we all got in the car and set out for surprises. I had Mom's scarf around my head so I couldn't see where we were going but that didn't stop me from knowing where I was. This would be good if I were after taken. K got mad at me when I asked her if she needed any money for tolls.

We made it to our surprise destination early enough to get good seats. So C, K, Mom and I saw The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus. For Mom it was the first time. After the movie Mom told us she wasn't feeling well and needed to go home. So we brought her home and then K and I went to Chile's because it was nearly 5:00 and we hadn't eaten anything but popcorn.

After food we drove to C's to watch the Golden Globes. There was a bit of time before it began so K took drums, C took guitar and I took the chair. Turns out, if you need to hold a note on drums you have to keep hitting it.

The Globes went well, a couple Globes went to people we wanted and then everyone was surprised by Robert, even Robert. Well done all. Somewhere in the middle of the Golden Globes C and K gave me their birthday gift. (Doctor Who Series Four with Donna Noble. I love Donna.)

We couldn't stay because the snow was interested in screwing with any plans we may have thought we had. Due to messed directions that didn't take us by K's place and determined snow, we looked for places to stay the night. There weren't any. We made it to Newington and though that is only about 15 minutes from my house, we couldn't make it. It would have taken us about 30 to 45 minutes to get the rest of the way home. So we got to the Motel 6 and K got us a room. She closed her eyes, I took off my pants, it was an interesting night.

WARNING: The following may not be suitable for those with weak stomachs.

Sometime in the morning I got up, grabbed my pants, and went into the bathroom where I bent my body in ways I forgot I had ever done before, and from somewhere sacred inside of me came the leftovers of the day before. Once, twice, a dozen times, internal became external and I hugged the toilet like I hadn't done in years. Somewhere between ending up on the floor and K waking up, I had put on my pants. Concerned, as a good friend would be, she came knocking to see if I was alright. Which I was not, but at that moment was stable. In informed her of my pants and their current location and she then opened the door. I remember making some statement about my toes and the polish and then I took the trash with me to bed. After sleeping a bit more we got up and I went right back into the bathroom to throw up again. I was alright for a bit and we had to check out so we chose to be on our way home.

We were well stuck in the parking spot and it took a bit of back and forth to get out. Arriving at home was no different. The end of the driveway was not plowed and the rocking sent me over the edge. I got out of the car, got into the house and again, threw up. This time, mostly pissed off, the puking was accompanied by half-sobs. I didn't even get to have the alcohol that would normally go along with this whole ordeal. So, after the fourth time I had to run to the bathroom to throw up, I lost count. Nothing stayed down. K stayed for a while and then was off because she had work the next day and figured it would be best to try and let me sleep. I did get to listen to most of Escape from L.A. while she watched it. We have yet to speak about the movies in depth.

At about 3:00am, the day after my birthday, I went to the bathroom and heaved nothing. Several times. I went back to bed and from there it has been better. I haven't thrown up since.

Mom had made cupcakes and decorated the house with frogs and a “river” to resemble the Princess and the Frog. The cupcakes have little, and I say little even though they take up most of the cupcake top, frogmallows on them that are rather tough and not very tasty. They are cute though.

It was a birthday I will probably always remember. Everyone tried so hard but I did a bang up job of ruining it. I was a good idea to move it up a day I suppose or it would have been completely ruined. Many thanks to K, C, and Mom for trying so hard.


  1. The whole thing was very sad to see. Puking on your birthday is no damn fair. Redo, I say. Plissken up!

    - Agent K.
    (well, if you're going to make me a letter, I'm-a gonna be a damn special agent.)

  2. I like you as an agent.

    The new "suit up" is Plissssken up! And yes. Do over.